Editing MirroLantern: or How Actually Cutting This Thing Together Scares the Heck Out of Me

I recently switched from editing in Premiere Pro to DaVinci Resolve. I did this for many reasons, but the main one was I was sick of paying Adobe $50 a month for software that is temperamental and prone to exploding. The whole idea of software-as-service is anti-consumer and absolutely bogus. After hearing wonderful things about Resolve, I paid the upfront cost for the program and was ready to wave goodbye to my old frenemy Premiere.

Except I forgot that learning a new NLE is like learning a new language; sure the programs functionally do the same thing just like how English and Spanish have the same words, but the process of figuring out how to speak is still time consuming and requires practice. It surprised me how something as simple as putting text on the screen could be a challenge, or how syncing audio and video tracks could send me on a thirty minute quest down YouTube Lane. Resolve is certainly a better program than Premiere, but the process of learning it has slowed down my editing efficiency massively.

I would like to believe that it’s my inexperience in Resolve that is making me hesitant to edit our new film, MirroLantern, but I don’t think it is. Sure, it might be a part of why I sit down, open the project, and feel dread, but it doesn’t explain the whole thing. See, I know from experience that I always hesitate before really jumping into an edit. I did the same thing with our 2021 film Those of Us Left Behind. We wrapped shooting on that film in August 2020, but I didn’t begin cutting it in earnest until mid September 2020. I feel as if I am standing at the edge of a really sweet pool, one with water slides and those little fountain things that squirts water everywhere, and I know that once I jump in I’ll have a grand old time playing water polo and having breath holding contests but the act of committing to it remains daunting. What could be in the water? Sharks? Beautiful fishes? My childhood best friend Carter? Anything could be in there.

Uncertainty, yes. I hesitate to jump into the edit because I know once my head is under the surface, endless challenges, difficult choices, and frustrating processes await, and I fear that I am not up to them. No matter how many projects I work on, I can never shake the feeling that I am a fraud, that I am stumbling around in the dark feeling for the solitary thread of logic that will make the film coherent. Confronting the footage that so many people worked so hard to get and realizing it’s shortcomings and its triumphs is genuinely terrifying.

But I also know that all of those things are what keep me coming back, the great joy of solving a pacing issue, or the euphoria of finding a truly bold cut. My issue is one of fixation. Once I’m in this edit it will dominate my thoughts, occupy my brain like a rowdy tenant, keeping me up late at night with it’s endless parties and stomping footsteps.

Anyway. This writing is just another excuse to not edit, so maybe I should stop messing around and do my job.

xoxo